Get me some Love…

“Don’t you look gorgeous..!! Have you lost weight..? I guess you are back to your pre wedding look.”Said her very own brother in law standing a little too close, close enough that she could smell the scotch and feel a little uncomfortable. She stepped back and said, ” No bhaiya, i am just a few kg fit, still 10 more to loose, whats happening with you, party party..!!”

But NO he just wanted to look at Shanaya and keep talking to her. It left her little confused. She could sense a different air between her and the darling little brother in law. As this got repeated a couple more times, she was sure even more. To her surprise now she was enjoying that. She was not avoiding him, neither was discouraging his action but definitely she was not supporting it.

Then finally one day she asked herself, what am i doing to him and to myself. Why she was not discouraging those acts, why was she enjoying what was happening repeatedly. He was too younger to behave so.

I believe that married women often end up in such situations to find and hold on to a long forgotten or unknown sense of self that feels valued, loved and desired by a partner.The problem is that they find something they may need, want and even deserve in a way that takes as much as it gives.A neglected, emotionally abused wife is ripe for the plucking to any “rescuer” who comes her way. Because he listens, sympathises, validates her, compliments her, or may be just gives her a little attention….all the things she needs from her husband that he should have been doing for her but wasn’t.

In the routine cordial of our lives, we stop appreciating, we stop giving that importance to that one person who is responsible for our present and whose present depends on us too. We often get to find men who fell in the charm of infidelity but lesser of women. Reason is not that women are more true in relationships BUT that ours is a society where men can still be forgiven but not a woman and hence they stop themselves as they say on the right time, at the right step, still keeping themselves unhappy, un appreciated and less loved.

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Its not an issue thats based on being a man or woman, its a relationship issue. Shanaya loved her husband and the kids to infinity but for once she was moved by that one small step taken by her brotherly being. That was not an attraction she had but that dissatisfaction she was living with.

Be it a man or a woman, God has given everyone a desire for a loving relationship with there partner. It’s a longing, a reaching out after, a powerful emotion that moves one to pursue a genuine, heart-to-heart relationship with the better half. We need to be little considerate, little affectionate, little  expressive and i think very importantly little young and fun loving.

We see so many loving couples departing just because they loved playing blame game more than getting quite sometimes, because no one wants to take that first step leaving the boredom behind, because sometimes ego takes over love.

Small things like cuddling, saying a happy hello and goodbye, a little compliment, once a fortnight date nights, once a week proper conversation over dinners etc can add that little something required sometimes. Marriage is so beautiful if handled with little delicacy and some expression.

 

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